August 17

What were the goals of Ksam Rekam?

Well, ksam is just a title. a function.

It’s a person who makes a mask.

And wears that mask.

And discovers who they are through that mask.

I get to have a name.

I have had many names.

Many lives. Many lessons.

I even get to have no name.

I get to be something lesser than a person,

and in that freedom become nothing.

And you can’t destroy nothing.

—-

The purpose of ksam rekam is to bring out an underlying pain.

Bring it out into the room to witness it. To make people understand that they’re in a room to begin with.

One of their own design. Their own world to explore and find within it the origin of its creation.

To reach deep and find yourself at the root of it all.

A mask hides.

A mask bides time.

A mask offers grief needed

to leave the past behind.

This is a practice. Ksam rekam is an embodiment of what art and music and love and loss offer.

Reflection.

To reflect onto one another,

to reflect back onto the self,

to reflect on what happens to us and in us and because of us.

—-

I have declared a permanent dedication to this process.

A permanent commitment to failure and learning and release.

We cannot let go of what we cannot confront.

The mask is a barrier.

Nobody deserves me outright.

Nobody deserves me inherently.

The garb hides my body.

It gives me consent.

It declares my intent and demands my deliberation in every step I take.

I want the conviction to walk this path.  Not for entertainment. Not for the world. But because I love it. And crave it. And even need it.

Most days I am a human, but in the days and weeks and months and years and lifetimes where it feels terrifying to be a human, I can instead be ksam rekam.